I want my hopes ~ not my fears ~ shape my future.

I am a fountain of fear in the shape of a girl. Quaky hopeless case. Prisoner of the four walls of my own mind, a slave to my own unwanted experiences, memories and nightmares. Alienated body and mind. Hidden from the world and the people behind curtained windows. Hidden from myself under hideous kilograms of fat.

He knows who I am, what I am, and why I am what I am. Understanding, acceptance and continued support - the three most important things that he gives me consistently day by day, every day. He has his own shadows, yet still there is enough light inside him to banish all my fears. He is my sentinel, my carer. His wise words often bring me great relief. This wonderful man taught me that whatever I imagine is my imagination not essentially true or reality. People who live in constant fear have problem with seeing things the way they really are. He is the guardian of my common sense. Fears tamer. Giver of hope. He saw the best in me, when everyone else around could only see the worst in me. He saw me at my worst, and he loved me at my worst.

The most important journey in my life is only just starting. Having him by my side I fear nothing. For he is my courage, my strength, and I love him with every fibre of my heart and soul.

Our hopes, not my fears, will shape our future.

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